Wednesday, June 4, 2008

The False Feminine

Well... my book research has taken me to a new study. I am exploring what it means to be falsely feminine. Our society tells us many things about what does or does not make us feminine but all those things aren't necessarily true. Since the majority of perusers through my blog are women, I am asking you (men feel free to comment here too please) what it means to be falsely feminine. What lies have we believed in, that actually tear down women's character and nature instead of lifting it up? Where in your own personal life have you been deceived into thinking this? Feel free to pass the blog along to any friends, I'd like to have as much input as possible on this topic. And if you hesitate to share because you do not want to admit the deception you have succumbed to, trust me... you are not alone. There are many lies that I have believed would fulfill me as a woman that have only succeeded in causing pain, sorrow, and grief in my life. As I stand on the other side of my experiences looking back on them, I cannot comprehend how the deception so easily sunk into who I was... but it did. I thank God immensely for striving so hard to bring me out of it; not only for my own sake, but also for the sake of my daughter. I want her to be able to grow up with a proper image of what it means to be feminine and not buy into what the world is trying to convince us is feminine. So without further ado... I ask of you: What does the "false feminine" mean to you?


5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Good Question Debbie!! There are so many lies that I've fallen prey to it would fill an entire page so at the risk of writing a novel here I'll merely say...for me the biggest lie has been the need for control. This takes on many faces from checkbook to birth control. I have had to learn to trust God and my husband. This is a deep question...it bears more thought I so I just may blog on it too. Thanks for the inspiration.

Amanda said...

That's a good question. With it I have tons of things running through my mind. Mostly confusing myself. If I can actually think of one thing out of this mess I call my brain I'll let you know. Thanks for the blog though. Really gets me thinking.

Anonymous said...

I wonder why in our society we put so much emphasis on our gender, instead of focussing on who we are on the inside and how we behave toward each other as human beings. It would be refreshing if we could leave behind the various (mostly negative) stereotypes of femininity and masculinity and behave in the loving way I think God would prefer.

Unknown said...

Stereotypes are one thing, but I can tell you that my being a woman deeply affects most aspects of my life. It affects my interactions, my thoughts, my faith. I agree that God prefers us to live in loving manner, but I don't think it's meant to usurp our gender. I think Debbie is also saying we need to stop attempting to fit negative stereotypes of femininity and masculinity. There are dangerous misconceptions of what it means to be feminine and in order to stay true to our genuine, God-given femininity we are wise to identify and understand God's view versus society's. Any of the ways we are believing things that conflict with God's design seem worth identifying and avoiding. I believe issues relating to gender are important enough for us all to concern ourselves with. If they weren't we wouldn't be male and female. Would we? That's how I see it, anyway. I do agree with anonymous in the sense that our society often fails to look deeper than a person's body/gender and would be right to turn the focus to how we treat each other. However, I think this is a semi-separate issue for discussion.

Just my thoughts off the top of my head. I like your questions, Debbie and I think it's valuable for you to be asking and investigating them.

Deborah Downs said...

The reason for the distinction in gender in a physical sense is because it is specifically how God made us. So there is a legitimate purpose for that separation. When looking at the areas of body, mind, and soul, they are all divided up into masculine and feminine. However in the case of the mind, they work as one. You have masculine and feminine hemispheres that work as one in the brain. In the soul we also have a masculine and feminine. This is evidenced where the bible is speaks of there being neither male or female in Christ. "In Christ" is a level referring to our spiritual lives. We are spiritually "in Christ". But for some reason our bodies are left separate with the distinction of male and female and yet they too are to work as one in a specific context. So somehow the way they work together and the proper exercise of masculine and feminine as pertains to their physical gender teaches us something we need to know on the spiritual and intellectual levels. If we are displaying a "false feminine" then the world is not learning anything from our physical display of that. So what they apply to their spiritual and intellectual femininity is warped and lacks fullness. We are a window to "something". And in order to find out what that "something" is, we have to do it right.