Hide and Seek. Probably the oldest of children’s games. I recall feelings of anticipation, excitement, fear, joy while playing hide and seek as a child. The anticipation and excitement of being sought out and pursued, the fear and adrenaline rush of being stumbled upon. And joy. Joy as we laughed over hiding places and the giddiness of a spot well chosen. “I was there the whole time and you didn’t even see me!”
I watch my children play hide and seek now. I listen to their giggles and heavy breathing as they try to stay quiet and covert to no avail. What makes hide and seek so fun? I think it is the knowledge that we are finding new places, cultivating our ingenuity and creativity as we engage and interact with a fresh perspective.
When Naomi first learned to play hide and seek with me (she had no younger sibling then) she always chose the same places. I would have to feign ignorance and work my way to where she was hiding. In her mind, these were the places that were safe, comfortable and known to her. This is where she knew I would find her. She would get so frustrated when I was not in my usual hiding spot. But it was still fun, because she knew I was playing. I was still there...somewhere. I would hear her little voice, “Mommy, where are you?” I did not give in. This was part of the fun. There was something about her finding me in a new place that elicited squeals of delight. I loved the look of surprise on her face, her little arms wrapping around my neck as she would lunge at me in elated reprieve. We’d laugh. Each time she found me she learned something new.
Now Naomi plays hide and seek with her little brother Declan. I watch the same scenario play out. Declan does not know to choose new places. He is impatient. If you take too long to find him, he will call out, “Come find me,” giving away his location. Naomi has cultivated the art of concealment and quickly finds new and creative places to abscond. Now I hear Declan’s not so little voice, “Naomi, where are you?” He knows she is there. She has not left him. She is engaging with him in her nonresponse, daring him to find her in a new and exclusive place. And when he finds her he laughs saying, “Naomi, that was great! You’re a great hider!”
God plays. God is creative. God is in the ordinary. God is in the new. I am accustomed to finding God in certain places. These are safe, comfortable, and known places to me. In my mind, this is where I will find God. This is where He is hiding. But there comes a time when I must stretch my creative genius and God lingers somewhere new. He waits for me to find Him, to seek Him out, to pursue Him. I go to the safe places first. I do not find Him. But He is there...somewhere. I call out, “God, where are you?” He does not answer. If He answers I no longer seek Him out; I fail to find Him somewhere new, somewhere unexpected that will bring forth my joy. We cease to play.
There are times when I feel fear, wondering if God has truly left me and if I am not instead playing some pointless game alone. Words heard long ago echo across the centuries and allay my fears, “The Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.” I know in that moment that my anxiety is without merit. Whispers of apprehension reveal what I should have known all along - He is somewhere new. He desires to broaden my horizons, to see me grow, to see me increase in the knowledge of Him. It is God at play and I have been invited to join. When I find Him we will laugh. I will delight in His creativeness because He has engaged me and drawn me to Him, to a new place, a new perspective, a new experience. When you find yourself crying out to Him, “God, where are you?” and He does not answer, think on it as an invitation to play, an opportunity to engage the Creator in a unique and exclusive way. Seek Him out. He is there - somewhere.
4 comments:
Great post! It is interesting to see where people experience God. For instance you said you find God in “safe, comfortable, and known places.” For me is the exact opposite, He finds me. Let me explain… I think we do experience God in safe, comfortable and known places but where I really need Him is in the difficult, the uncomfortable and dangerous places. Now, I am not saying to look for these horrible situations but rather that these situations are such a part of humanity that everyone experiences the difficult, the uncomfortable, and the dangerous. Anyway, enjoyed your post, liked the part about God “inviting us to play” but feel that we are the ones that need to be found… after all, God knows exactly where He is and where we are at. “God does not have to, but He can, take to Himself the suffering of another in such a way that in doing so, in founding and accomplishing of this fellowship, He does what corresponds to His worth.” Karl Barth :)
I have seen you in difficult places before. The way I have experienced you during those times is avidly seeking out God. You may think He found you, but He always knew where He was and where you were. I'd argue that He waited for you to find Him in the place He intended for you. That's just my experience of you, not as you. You sought Him out directly. You reached out to those around you to understand why such suffering existed and where God was in all of it.
I think on a daily basis we seek God and find Him in familiar places, but when the going gets tough and life throws us a change of circumstances, we are forced to seek God out in something new.
And I think the point Barth is getting at is that God's purposes and will are accomplished according to the rules of the "game" He is playing with us. We find Him in the new places because it is His intent and desire to be found, to beckon us into a new level of intimacy and relationship with Him. It is not that God ignores or avoids our suffering. Quite the contrary. He is entering into our suffering and alleviating our burden by forcing us to focus on finding Him.
Very thought provoking... I've known God to seemingly hide... but I knew HE was always there.
“Difficult places,” yes… you are putting it mildly :). You are correct in rightly stating that “He waited for you to find Him in the place He intended for you.” God orchestrates things according to His will. We seek Him and we do find Him in familiar places but remember that “seeking” is not something that we do on our own. The irony is this: Once we have found Christ it is not the end of our seeking but the beginning. Usually, when we find what we are looking for, it signals the end of our searching. But when we “find” Christ, it is the beginning of our search. So… continually we are discovering and rediscovering Christ, and I think this is the true meaning of renewal and not some limited human experience… but that is another topic.
In my opinion Barth is saying that God suffers in solidarity with those who suffer and establishes a relationship based on His own worth rather than ours or our experience. Anyway, good things to ponder.
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